My best friend committed suicide

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This topic contains 16 replies, has 14 voices, and was last updated by Gravel Pit  Gravel Pit 2 months ago.

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  • #905755
    +11
    RealityBites
    RealityBites
    Participant
    2122

    My best friend committed suicide.
    I first met Mike in my first year after transferring to a University as a Junior
    He was my roommate in my dorm. He transferred from Caltech.
    At the time I was taking a lot of Upper Division Mathematics courses and hadn’t started my upper division Physics courses.
    He was trying to relearn Calculus and Differential Equations since he had dropped out from Caltech for a while…
    and so I tutored him on the Math part while he was taking some Physics.
    The next year I started my Upper Division Physics which I struggled with because I bypassed almost all lower division Physics courses…
    so while Mathematically my answers would make sense…Physically they didn’t…and Mike ended up tutoring me in Physics and helping me get up to speed until I got enough base knowledge of physics under my belt where my Intuition in solving Physics problems advanced and then began to be on par with his, and then surpassing him due to my better training in Mathematics.
    He focused on the Experimental side of Physics and I focused on the Theoretical and Mathematical side….
    We hung out a lot, were housemates in several houses off campus….and we hung out together after we both dropped out of school and then when we both
    went back to school to finish our degrees.
    So….an old friend whom I’ve known for over 35 years who had a lot of serious health issues and emotional and financial issues that life dealt him.
    He got dealt a s~~~ty hand at the poker table of life, but made the most of it, and played his hand pretty well.
    He had been suicidal for decades….but he got diagnosed with a rare and fatal medical condition and his health had started to deteriorate very rapidly and he was looking at
    spending the rest of his short life in an Iron Lung, in pain…and he didn’t want to have his life end that way.
    So he took the very courageous step of ending his life on his own terms.

    I tried to give him little doses of the Red Pill…but …it was just too much for him to accept. He just couldn’t do it emotionally.
    He couldnt’ come to the terms that women are all Hypergamous, and that women (with very very few exceptions) actually (and very dimly) will “love” a man….
    and that this applies not only to women that he had a romantic interest in but also his mom, sister, and so on….women are flat out incapable of experiencing love the way a man does in terms of depth and intensity.

    And this was a constant source of befuddlement for him. To the very end of his life…he kept reaching out towards women: seeking love and never finding it.
    In the end….he died alone.
    I have a post that he made to FB as he was dying of a screenshot of a text message he had sent to a young woman.
    He posted it on 24 March 2019…and died that very morning.
    I am not sure if TinyPic will host the screen shot…but I am going to give it a go…

    In case it doesn’t go through, the Text message Transcript is as follows:
    9:34 AM – Phone Charge 19%
    ….
    Mike: “Also a photocopy of my “executed” – signed – Last Will and Testament”
    Mike: “I’ll be in Spokane for a week or so and then back here”
    Mike: “Please come and visit me, even if you cannot stay”
    Mike: “The sound of your voice would be a great comfort to me in my time of sorrow”
    Arabella: (no answer)

    Next message to Arabella on 24 March
    9:33 AM with Phone Charge at 19%
    Mike: I shall die soon
    Text Message Response on Phone
    “Free Msg: Receiver 15039282957 – unable to receive message – Message Blocking is Active.”

    He later died that morning. He posted the managed to post the message to his FB account and link it to Arabella’s FB account.

    So if you guys are wondering why you are alone, or why women are so callous and cold….it’s because they are incapable of empathy and love.
    You are nothing more than a useful plow horse whose job is to plow the field with, until a better deal comes along and she can trade you in for a better plow horse.
    You are just a means to an end and nothing more: and not someone they necessarily want to be around.
    (see: Briffault’s Law)

    For most women: you are just a S~~~ Burger that they have to bite into in order to have a chance at having a roof over her head, some nice things and a chance at a liveable retirement
    instead of the drudgery of working for the rest of her life and struggling.

    Mike had helped out Arabella in the past…but he was dying and all he asked was just a little company and he was no longer useful…so he was blocked.
    He got used…
    And this sort of thing happened time after time throughout his entire life…as it has happened to myself and to others on this forum.

    Michael David Crawford
    24 February, 1964 – 24 March, 2019

    He was 55

    https://www.dignitymemorial.com/obituaries/spokane-wa/michael-crawford-8232299

    #905760
    +5
    Twist
    Twist
    Participant

    May he rest in Peace.

    You were his friend – more than many ever have.

    #905762
    +4
    Monk
    Monk
    Participant
    14568

    He was fortunate in that he had you as a friend.

    I trust that his Will left nothing to this vile woman who turned him away in his final hours.

    #905763
    +6
    Gravel Pit
    Gravel Pit
    Participant

    on his own terms.

    RealityBites, my heart goes out to you man. Very saddened by this post.
    When its up close and personal like that, it yanks you hard.

    women are flat out incapable of experiencing love the way a man does

    we keep fishing for something in women, that just aint there

    So if you guys are wondering why you are alone, or why women are so callous and cold….it’s because they are incapable of empathy and love.
    You are nothing more than a useful plow horse whose job is to plow the field with, until a better deal comes along and she can trade you in for a better plow horse.
    You are just a means to an end and nothing more: and not someone they necessarily want to be around.
    (see: Briffault’s Law)

    straight up truth. Some men want to argue against this because they’re still “happily married” after 30 years. But that is only because he is still currently the best Option. He is still making good income and obeying her desires. Its funny how fleeting her loyalty is when he suddenly loses his job or his health turns south. All the sudden Vows go out the window and she is “in love” with another man. (She cant help it, she is “in love”) …

    I like mgtow because it helped me find VALUE in myself. I get validation and self esteem boosts from just being ME.
    I do not rely on unreliable sources like women, to survive emotionally.

    #905766
    +4
    Gravel Pit
    Gravel Pit
    Participant

    Find love… in loving YOURSELF.

    LOVE YOURSELVES GOD DAMMIT!

    You CANNOT depend on a woman for LOVE

    #905777
    +6
    Daryll55
    Daryll55
    Participant
    2490

    I am sorry for the loss of your freind;my condolences.

    EVERY MAN should read this and learn.

    A similar situation happened to someone I knew and worked with. We had different personalities and opinions,BUT we both had respect for one-another concerning issues of manhood.
    He had a really HOT wife that liked to spend $$$. He really didn’t mind as it was a matter of stature to him.
    He got a terminal illness that took his life in 2 short years. His wife never changed her habits or attitude and left him after a year. He “Celebrated” his life alone the last months and then went into solitude. A few months later,.. his illness causing him great pain; he took his life by gun, (suicide). That was how he ended his pain and his life,…… ALONE.
    Thinking of his pain and anguish; I can’t fathom the inner fortitude he had to have to pull that trigger, and at the same time I admire him for doing so.
    He went (like your friend), his own way!

    Marry again, Hell NO ! ( Even JESUS was hung on a cross just once)

    #905795
    +3
    CPT Obvious
    CPT Obvious
    Participant
    1787

    That was an emotional read and red pill. Thank you for sharing.

    "You don't know a woman till you have met her in divorce court."
    #905801
    +2
    Jake
    Jake
    Participant
    834

    that sucks reminds me of a friend that shot himself, still angers me and his ex that was scewing his best mate for four years wouldn’t let him see his kids, all too much bang son without father the smug cow didn’t feel a thing I bet.

    #905812
    +2
    SpiderHerder
    SpiderHerder
    Participant
    2825

    I raise my glass to you, and him.

    Great men are rare, except here. lol

    #905818
    +3
    Autolite
    Autolite
    Participant

    A few months later,.. his illness causing him great pain; he took his life by gun, (suicide). That was how he ended his pain and his life,…… ALONE.

    Which in theory is what marriage was suppose to guarantee against from happening.

    “For better or worse. In sickness and in health.”

    Marriage is supposedly a legal, mutually agreed upon contract that ensures that one does not abandon the other when everything goes for a schit. But we all know that that’s just bullschit.

    We really need to start underscoring and pointing out all of the bullschit that our society promotes and propagates. In all of it’s forms…

    #905921
    +3
    Puffin Stuff
    Puffin Stuff
    Participant

    That txt conversation says it all. The least sign of weakness and out they run. They all think they’re pussy is made of gold, even post wall. There is nothing to be done other than take care of yourself.

    #icethemout; Remember Thomas Ball. He died for your children.

    #905954
    +1
    743 roadmaster
    743 roadmaster
    Participant

    “a lot of serious health issues and emotional and financial issues that life dealt him”
    Seen this list take down a lot of good men.

    mgtow is its own worst enemy- https://www.campusreform.org/

    #905965
    +1
    Darth Covfefe
    Darth Covfefe
    Participant
    62

    I lost my bestie back on the end of March from suicide. KA3RCS is now a silent key 🙁

    The only reason women have so much privilege is because 20 million years ago they forgot how to lay eggs.

    #905968
    +3
    Branched off
    Branched off
    Participant
    9307

    I am sorry about your friend. What a sad last few hours it seems.

    He didn’t understand women did he?

    What many emotionally vulnerable men never get is that a man is never less attractive to a woman than at the moment he needs her support. That is weakness and neediness and she can’t be doing with that pulling her down. Women don’t interact with men to get pulled down. They interact to get raised up. that’s all there is to it with hypergamy.

    Such men need to learn that if they want women they need to fake it till they make it and when they fake it well enough they will have lots of female helpers. (Though it will still cost them more than it is worth probably)

    A woman is like fire -fun to play with, can warm you through and cook your food, needs constant feeding, can burn you and consume all you own

    #906146
    +2
    RealityBites
    RealityBites
    Participant
    2122

    Thank you everyone….I’ve been having a pretty tough time.
    Both Mike and I…just didn’t understand women and their behavior nor anything about Evolutionary Psychology…
    we pal’ed around a lot, and helped each other out both homework, lab reports, as well as getting a job, or having a roof over our heads when we were going through tough times, and we cheered each other up when we were (inevitably) rejected by women and/or used by them…
    And then we went our separate ways…we both got married and moved away…both of our marriages ended up in divorce..
    we stayed in touch via email…and the years passed….

    For me….it wasn’t until after my divorce that I stumbled across MGTOW, MRA and the PUA communities…and started to read books and articles…and very carefully observed and verified what I read in the women that I was dating…and I very slowly woke up to what was going on….I didn’t understand the “WHY?” of it: until I started to read Articles on Evolutionary Psychology…after a while the light very slowly came on.

    It was and has been a long and continuously evolving process…

    I tried to help Mike out…sending him little bits of Red Pill information here and there…but it was too painful for him to really accept…and in the very end…he got what so many men get when they are facing disaster (loss of a job, terminal illness, end of life, etc.): he got dropped like a hot rock…without even a goodbye or “see you on the flip side”…not even a “So Long Sucker!”…nothing…the final act was one of Rejection from a woman whom he had repeatedly helped…

    And this brings up a bitter Red Pill Lesson a lesson that my friend got bitch slapped across his face with as he was dying.
    The Way of Women is using Men as a Means to an End and then Abandoning Them when disaster strikes or when a better deal comes along – see Briffault’s Law
    Love is an illusion. Men love: Women don’t.

    Been pretty tough on me emotionally…still processing the loss of my friend.

    #906152
    Sam Raven
    Sam Raven
    Participant
    181

    I thought Iron Lungs were from the WW1 era. Seeing those machines I would have done what he did if the rest of my life was to be stuck in that tin can.

    #906156
    +1
    Gravel Pit
    Gravel Pit
    Participant

    Im sure that if YOU had crossed his mind in those final hours, just that positive note would have kept him going. It just didnt occur to him. Poor fella.

    As you said though I think, he was medically having bad trouble? We cant judge how a man choose to go out I guess if he is in poor health.

    But remember the good things. Cherish the memories and fun nights and trouble yall got into as younger dudes.

    Youre still kicking and wiser from all of it

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