NAWALT + Conflicting Messages = AWALT

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Knights Templar Rising

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This topic contains 37 replies, has 15 voices, and was last updated by Knights Templar Rising  Knights Templar Rising 2 years, 9 months ago.

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  • #359080
    +8
    Knights Templar Rising
    Knights Templar Rising
    Participant
    4928

    I have been dating a woman for 5 weeks, boinking for 4 weeks, known for 6 weeks. She seemed *on paper* to be an NAWALT, but as I have said there are only SWABTO. Cool in many ways, everything from liking video games all the way to Sci Fi. Not fat, and reasonably active and in decent shape for early 40’s. Doesn’t like rom-com movies or s~~~ty sitcoms. Good job, never had kids, and 6 years younger than me. Hot as hell in bed, and low maintenance when it comes to activities and restaurants. Even admits the key relationship conundrum between women and men, quoting “All women are crazy. But all men are stupid, because the men keep going back to those women!”.

    Now where does the problem come in? -> conflicting messages. For every possible subject, she has made conflicting statements or actions. Prime example = Stating that she prefers to hang in and order some food instead of spending money going out. But then 4 weeks later, after I asked her multiple times to do activities, bitches about me not taking her out anywhere. When I mention the times I asked her, she bitches that I need to make the plans like a date.

    Name one subject, and I will tell you how she contradicted it.

    Sovereignty above all else.

    #359094
    +9
    Bigboy83
    bigboy83
    Participant
    11311

    If you understand them, you cant love them, if you love them, you cant understand them.

    Which is why they confuse you, if your confused by them, you want them. Cause, well, your asking us about it.

    Women dont want you to understand them, because its game over, they want you to mis understand them.

    Shit Tested, Cunt Approved.

    #359095
    +12
    Keymaster
    Keymaster
    Keymaster

    she bitches

    The key is right there. Either way … “she bitches”.

    Makes you wonder: are women happiest when they are complaining?

    Name one subject, and I will tell you how she contradicted it.

    Exactly. Women are very good at this – twisting everything into a negative to suit them. Take ANY situation, and a woman can skew it into something to complain about.

    Name it.

    Say you’ve never been married, you’re single, available, no kids, no baggage.
    What does a woman think? “What’s wrong with him”.

    Anything else and it’s “why are there no available men?”

    Women are happiest when they are complaining. They will look for the negative in any situation and twist it until they find it. To keep you confused. When you understand it, you stop letting her live in your head. This is why I will hold a mirror up to her and call a woman out on EVERY one of her contradictions. Force her to deal with it instead, and demand consistency from her. She will start to short circuit.

    “I don’t expect anything from you except consistency. Don’t tell me you prefer to stay in and later blame me for not planning a date. You won’t get away with it. Learn to communicate directly, or leave. I’m not interested in being a mind reader.”.

    ^ This is actually #3 on my short (personal) list of requirements.
    #1. Respect my time and property. F~~~ with either of those and you’re history.
    #2. I gotta be having fun all the time. I can be a good friend when times are tough, but if you’re a buzzkill to be around, we’re done.

    When you lay it out for them, they will actually agree and appreciate it and it asks virtually NOTHING from her. But it’s only a matter of time before they break all three. Usually within two weeks or much less. Not my problem.

    An EX once lay in bed facing away from me crying™ because I encouraged independence in her and told her to get her own place / take that new job (even if it meant being away for 3 months) etc. I fell for the tears and we never spoke about it again. 2 1/2 years later, she blamed me for “not letting her be her own person”. It made me so angry I wished I could rewind back to the day she was crying and KICK HER OUT INTO THE STREET with no feeling or remorse.

    That’s when I started re-writing the script. It would never happen again.
    Demand consistency.

    If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.
    #359099
    +12
    PistolPete
    PistolPete
    Participant
    27141

    To quote a line from Hogan’s Heroes:

    “Col. Hogan, I just don’t understand women.”

    “Schultz, nobody understands women until you’re married, then its too late.”

    #359128
    +3
    Nero
    Nero
    Participant
    1466

    To quote a line from Hogan’s Heroes:

    “Col. Hogan, I just don’t understand women.”

    “Schultz, nobody understands women until you’re married, then its too late.”

    Good s~~~!

    #359139
    +8
    Awakened
    Awakened
    Participant
    33768

    Knowing this sweet lil cupcake for just 6 weeks, you’re just BEGINNING to get to to know the whole women. So far, she has just showed you what she wanted you to see. The longer you know her, the more of her s~~~ you get to be exposed to.

    Did it make you wonder: She’s attractive, good body, good in the sack, low maintenance, good job, enjoys “cool” activities etc, AND in her early 40’s she’s NEVER been married. Don’ you think you might be missing something ???

    My GUESS is time will tell just how bat s~~~ crazy she really is. I hope I’m wrong for your sake because nobody needs that in their life, but there’s SOME reason that this precious lil flower has not roped herself a hubby along the way Makes you wonder ??

    In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash

    #359143
    +7
    Knights Templar Rising
    Knights Templar Rising
    Participant
    4928

    After this first post-divorce girlfriend, I am beginning to put some credence behind “The Oil Change Dating Theory”. It seems that within 3 month, they will either reveal their crazy or you will grow bored with them. After only banging her a dozen times, over the course of a month, “The Coolidge Effect” is taking hold, the initial sex fog has worn off and her quirks are becoming irritating. I fear it will not be much longer until the sex is no longer worth the annoyance.

    In the bigger picture, she revealed her crazy only 2 weeks after our first bang…
    [calls me on a random week night]
    Her: Can I have a serious conversation with you?
    Me: Umm, okayyy…
    Her: Can you promise to keep an open mind?
    Me: Mayyybeee…
    Her: I belong to a Kink meetup group…
    Me: Umm, WTF does that mean?
    Her: You don’t know what Kink is?
    Me: Yeah, I do, I just don’t know what they do at the group.
    Her: It’s people that are into the BDSM lifestyle
    Me: And WTF does that mean?
    Her: Well, it’s like any other meetup group.
    Me: And WTF does that mean?
    Her: Well, a meetup group is where people with similar interests get together.
    Me: I know what MEETUP GROUP is!!! WTF do you do there???
    Her: Well we get in smaller groups, and do things we find fun, like chess or going to a new restaurant. But it’s all non-sexual.
    Me: So do you get in a big group and discuss your kink fantasies?
    Her: Yes, sometimes…
    Me: I’m not into the lifestlye.
    Her: I know, I specifically wanted someone who wasn’t from the group.
    Me: Why didn’t you state this bulls~~~ in your OKstupid profile?
    Her: [whining] because all the men either say I am disgusting, or they think it means I am OK with group sex.
    Me: Umm, doesn’t that tell you something?
    Her: LISTEN, YOU AREN’T NORMAL! You are crazy too! You have a kink, it’s your downhill mountain biking, that is your rush. That would be just like you going to a biking meetup group.
    Me: Not really!
    [followed by 15 more minutes of classic female tactics, shaming language with an enormous dose of the rationalization hamster]

    She doesn’t realize I am in for the long con now. After her dropping that bomb on me, I can no longer take her serious on any level. My biggest gripe is that she was lying via omission, and manipulated me by waiting to tell me until 5 weeks into knowing her (almost 3 weeks banging). Classic female sociopathic manipulative behavior. She doesn’t realize that the second she mentioned her “kink lifestyle”, was the second I began to look at her as nothing more than a disposable f~~~ toy. My real dilemma is whether to ditch her before x-mas, good enough to stick my dick in…but not good enough to waste time and money getting a gift for. Ahh, it’s great to be middle aged and no longer blinded by hormones, she doesn’t realize 99% of women are completely interchangeable to me…she will soon.

    Sovereignty above all else.

    #359148
    +3
    Knights Templar Rising
    Knights Templar Rising
    Participant
    4928

    Knowing this sweet lil cupcake for just 6 weeks, you’re just BEGINNING to get to to know the whole women. So far, she has just showed you what she wanted you to see. The longer you know her, the more of her s~~~ you get to be exposed to.

    Did it make you wonder: She’s attractive, good body, good in the sack, low maintenance, good job, enjoys “cool” activities etc, AND in her early 40’s she’s NEVER been married. Don’ you think you might be missing something ???

    My GUESS is time will tell just how bat s~~~ crazy she really is. I hope I’m wrong for your sake because nobody needs that in their life, but there’s SOME reason that this precious lil flower has not roped herself a hubby along the way Makes you wonder ??

    To clarify, she was married. He left her for another woman. But yes, after a year her being on the market with no luck, I can see why this “catch” has been “released” so many times.

    Sovereignty above all else.

    #359152
    +4
    Phantom
    Phantom
    Participant
    3328

    Sounds like she’s chasing c~~~…

    It’s just to good to be true???

    #359158
    +5

    Anonymous
    51

    In all my years of trying to learn how female brains work, and getting pretty darn good at it, the conclusuin I come to is..

    Dont bother.

    Just understand that it is going to be

    MISERABLE.

    Thats what they do best.Make Men missrable.

    Ask Schultzy!!

    The conflicting info is 1 they have no real beliefe system

    2 .To keep you in a confused and in a defensive mode.
    Like you are now.

    #359167
    +5
    Awakened
    Awakened
    Participant
    33768

    I can see why this “catch” has been “released” so many times.

    They “look” so different once you begin to see the “real” them, and not what they wanted you to see, or what you were blind to see in the beginning.

    Besides the whole BDSM lifestyle fun stuff, I can only imagine what else she has yet to “share” with you ??

    In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash

    #359169
    +2

    Anonymous
    51

    I can see why this “catch” has been “released” so many times.

    They “look” so different once you begin to see the “real” them, and not what they wanted you to see, or what you were blind to see in the beginning.

    Besides the whole BDSM lifestyle fun stuff, I can only imagine what else she has yet to “share” with you ??

    std’s

    #359170
    +3
    Masculine_Man
    Masculine_Man
    Participant
    2733

    I have been dating a woman for 5 weeks, boinking for 4 weeks, known for 6 weeks. She seemed *on paper* to be an NAWALT, but as I have said there are only SWABTO. Cool in many ways, everything from liking video games all the way to Sci Fi. Not fat, and reasonably active and in decent shape for early 40’s. Doesn’t like rom-com movies or s~~~ty sitcoms. Good job, never had kids, and 6 years younger than me. Hot as hell in bed, and low maintenance when it comes to activities and restaurants. Even admits the key relationship conundrum between women and men, quoting “All women are crazy. But all men are stupid, because the men keep going back to those women!”.

    Now where does the problem come in? -> conflicting messages. For every possible subject, she has made conflicting statements or actions. Prime example = Stating that she prefers to hang in and order some food instead of spending money going out. But then 4 weeks later, after I asked her multiple times to do activities, bitches about me not taking her out anywhere. When I mention the times I asked her, she bitches that I need to make the plans like a date.

    Name one subject, and I will tell you how she contradicted it.

    Sounds like you already made up your mind. I’ll make it easy for you, Christmas and New Year will soon come. She wants a gift, and unless New Year is spectacular, she will drop you like a bad habit. She’s already planting the seed by picking unreasonable fights. If you don’t believe me, just sit and wait. If I were in your shoes, use her only for sex, drop her and move on. Preferably before the holidays, save yourself some money. Save your dignity, leave her.

    She doesn’t realize I am in for the long con now. After her dropping that bomb on me, I can no longer take her serious on any level. My biggest gripe is that she was lying via omission, and manipulated me by waiting to tell me until 5 weeks into knowing her (almost 3 weeks banging). Classic female sociopathic manipulative behavior. She doesn’t realize that the second she mentioned her “kink lifestyle”, was the second I began to look at her as nothing more than a disposable f~~~ toy. My real dilemma is whether to ditch her before x-mas, good enough to stick my dick in…but not good enough to waste time and money getting a gift for. Ahh, it’s great to be middle aged and no longer blinded by hormones, she doesn’t realize 99% of women are completely interchangeable to me…she will soon.

    Disposable f~~~ toy is what I call women. Just like above, I’d save money and drop her before Christmas. There are lots of simps who paid her drinks, dinners and gifts throughout the years, this one won’t be bad.

    If it costs you your peace of mind, then it is too expensive.

    #359171
    +4
    Knights Templar Rising
    Knights Templar Rising
    Participant
    4928

    The weird thing is, that I am doing a good job of outwardly projecting the notion that she is in control of the relationship. She has no clue that I barely take her seriously any more, and can look at her a nothing but a manipulative nutjob and a sportf~~~ for me. She has even made delusional comments with her thinking I am head over heels for her, when the reality is that I wouldn’t miss a step if she dumped me tomorrow. God I love how the SMV reverses for us 40-something men, once I grow tired of her I will only have one thing to say: “NEXT!!!”

    Sovereignty above all else.

    #359176
    +5
    PistolPete
    PistolPete
    Participant
    27141

    Admittedly I’m a tad simple at times so…let me get this straight:

    She’s into a BDSM group;
    She’s into the BDSM lifestyle;
    But its non-sexual?
    Then why raise the issue with you at all?

    Frankly I’m lost here??

    #359188
    +5
    Masculine_Man
    Masculine_Man
    Participant
    2733

    Admittedly I’m a tad simple at times so…let me get this straight:

    She’s into a BDSM group;
    She’s into the BDSM lifestyle;
    But its non-sexual?
    Then why raise the issue with you at all?

    Frankly I’m lost here??

    Because it is sexual, and she hasn’t admitted it yet.

    If it costs you your peace of mind, then it is too expensive.

    #359189
    +3
    Knights Templar Rising
    Knights Templar Rising
    Participant
    4928

    Admittedly I’m a tad simple at times so…let me get this straight:

    She’s into a BDSM group;
    She’s into the BDSM lifestyle;
    But its non-sexual?
    Then why raise the issue with you at all?

    Frankly I’m lost here??

    Exactly. Even if it is just discussion, it’s not appropriate when it’s co-ed. Her kink is to be a bottom masochist, and specifically painful nipple play and being slapped on the ass until it’s near bruised. There is no way she can tell me that her discussions are non-sexual because they are just discussions, typical hamster rationalization, anyone with a brain knows her pussy must get soaking wet at these discussions. The irony is, when I dump her eventually, I wont complain about the BDSM thing, I will only give her the omission/manipulation reason. I love it when dumb broads are so convinced that they have set the pace and tone, only to get blindsided by me when their own behaviors doom their relationship with me. Long con, long con…

    Sovereignty above all else.

    #359190
    +3
    Phantom
    Phantom
    Participant
    3328

    Her: I know, I specifically wanted someone who wasn’t from the group.
    Me: Why didn’t you state this bulls~~~ in your OKstupid profile?

    Besides the whole BDSM lifestyle fun stuff, I can only imagine what else she has yet to “share” with you ??

    But its non-sexual?

    Because it is sexual, and she hasn’t admitted it yet.

    If I were a betting man & if this were poker…I am all in & I call.

    #359193
    +5

    Anonymous
    51

    Admittedly I’m a tad simple at times so…let me get this straight:

    She’s into a BDSM group;
    She’s into the BDSM lifestyle;
    But its non-sexual?
    Then why raise the issue with you at all?

    Frankly I’m lost here??

    Right….people go to bdsm groups to disscus it. Hhahah yea f~~~ing right…

    #359194
    +4
    Phantom
    Phantom
    Participant
    3328

    Right….people go to bdsm groups to disscus it. Hhahah yea f~~~ing right…

    I will believe it when porn stars refuse to have sex … ROFL

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