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How Not to Lie to your Daughter

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In a most pathetic effort to sell  cars  the “wage gap” lie to feminist cheerleaders at the Super Bowl 2017, Audi bends itself in half and inserts a rolled-up Meryl Streep acceptance speech into its own rectum, and Audi’s customer base is Gone in Sixty Seconds.

“What do I tell my daughter?”

“Why don’t you tell her the truth?”

You could tell her how professional race car driver Danica Patrick hit a pedestrian member of her own pit crew in a controlled racing environment – which is the biggest mistake you can possibly make with a car – twice – and didn’t even accept personal responsibility for it.


“Hi. Um, you know, it’s really, really unfortunate what happened today. Thoughts and prayers are with him, with his family and hopefully he can get back on the track soon and be able to do what he loves. Thank you.”

– Danica Patrick

Hi, um, what the man in question “loves” is not getting hit by race cars. The woman in question doesn’t belong in the driver’s seat, but she still earns more than many men who never did that, which means she is grossly overpaid. That’s the TRUTH™ about your stupid “wage gap”.

“You don’t like to see that kind of thing, but, you know, it’s not Danica’s fault, it’s not anybody’s fault” said Marco Andretti, Danica Patrick’s teammate and apparent co-conspirator in the murder of our good friend Personal Responsibility. We’ve all said something stupid to cover for a woman’s mistakes. Well maybe not all of us, but on this website, we don’t need to praise women for their screw ups and will call a spade a spade.

“Wrong place, wrong time” said Mitch Davis, Dale Coyne Racing’s chief mechanic.
“Wrong place, wrong time, wrong gender.” says a man knocked over by female driver.

Is it a coincidence that women get in more accidents per mile driven than men? Is it a coincidence that women look at how expensive your shoes are before deciding if they’re going to have sex? But what if these guys are right? What if crashing a car into a person really wasn’t Danica Patrick’s fault? Even though it’s everyone’s fault in the real world even when they’re drunk. When “men are better drivers” becomes a dirty term, “It wasn’t my fault” is the next phrase in line. Fault defines “betterness”. In order to undermine basic valuations of “betterness”, fault must be discounted.

Electricity, medicine, and penicillin is men’s “fault”.
It’s Danica Patrick’s fault her car ran into a fleeing man and dented his head.

While we’re congratulating Danica Patrick on being the first woman to win an IndyCar race, let’s also congratulate her on being the first woman to brutalize a pit crew member with a thousand pounds of steel and fiber glass. If Bill Buckner can’t get away with blowing the World Series, why does Danica Patrick get away with committing the worst female driving disaster in history? It’s because she’s a woman. As long as women can cry and look good in a bikini, they’ll never have to deal with man’s best friend Personal Responsibility. And that’s a good thing, as he is a very harsh and crude man.

“What do I tell my daughter? Do I tell her that her Grandpa is worth more than her Grandma? That her Dad is worth more than her Mom?”

“Depends. Did her grandma spend more or save more? Did you earn, invest and save more than your wife? Tell your daughter the truth.”

“Do I tell her that she will be automatically worth less than every man she ever meets?”

“Are you a man of integrity? Then stop brainwashing her with that toxic feminist nonsense.”

“Or maybe… I’ll be able to tell her something else.”

Yeah maybe. Because if you don’t tell your daughter the TRUTH™, she’s going to devolve into a toxic mess who stopped maturing when she started menstruating, and you will be personally responsible for brainwashing her into becoming this:

Stop lying to your daughters about some mythical “wage gap” – today. Oprah and Beyoncé aren’t whining about it. Neither are men who earn less than those women do. Your daughter will receive more freebie unearned advantages than you can even begin to conceptualize, but they are not genuine advantages. They are severely detrimental to her personal development.

As a man, you already know what personal responsibility is. You have no choice but to accept it because you are forced to, even when something is “not your fault”. A man will be expected and required to pay for other people’s mistakes, actions and behavior, because the skewed legal system says your daughter is incapable of making her own choices, decisions and accepting personal responsibility for herself.

You can’t even hold up Danica Patrick as a shining example for your daughter.
So now it’s going to be up to you.

Decide. Today. Else in twenty or thirty years, she will “blame” you and tell you it’s all your “fault”. Words that don’t need to exist when there is such a thing as personal responsibility. Forget blame. You’ll be personally responsible. You won’t even be able to blame Audi. But you can start by never buying one.

Tell your daughter the truth.
Or you can kiss “your daughter” goodbye.

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